Dear Younger Me,
Life is not as hard as you think it is. You’re going to think it’s hard and some days you feel like you cannot possibly go on anymore, but you always find the strength to go on. Why? Because you’ve always been stronger than you give yourself credit for.
Take plenty of naps. You’re going to need them. One, they’re awesome. But secondly, sometimes you annoy yourself to the point a nap is the only solution.
Stop being scared to take risks and be daring. Stop being scared to dream. It’s going to take you awhile to figure this out, but once you do, it’ll be amazing at how much you will set your sights on to accomplish. A day will come where you participate in this thing called National Novel Writing Month and you will complete your first novel. You will hate it, but it will give you the motivation you need to keep aspiring to be the writer you really want to become.
You will fall in love one day. And the man you fall in love with won’t be like any other man you’ve encountered before. This man you fall in love with will love you for all of who you are. And because of his love for you, you will learn to love yourself more and you will learn to love others more. And when you become a mother, you’ll have a love for God you never knew possible and a love for life that goes beyond comprehension!
Your biggest challenge will still be your temper, but between being a wife and a mother, you will start to mellow out on the things that upset you. And you will continue to mellow out because marriage and motherhood show you what’s important and what’s not. And a lot of things that aren’t important, that you made important, will be put in their proper place.
I will write you more letters in the future, so don’t worry about that. But where you are now and where you end up when I’m writing this letter is a night and day difference. You learn to realize and believe that you are beautiful and you stop becoming afraid to let that beauty show.
Always and with love.
I tend to do this thing where I convince myself that I have nothing to write about. I act like it’s a massive dread to sit down and start punching away at the keys on my laptop and just type one word after another until, viola!, I’ve actually written something. I just don’t get myself sometimes. But whatever, I’m still growing up.
The best thing I’m learning for myself is to jot down my ideas. And even if I don’t do anything with that idea in the moment, it’s written down and not forgotten. I can work on it over time and eventually turn it into something more. Not forcing the words is always the best case scenario. And I’m finally figuring that out, but like I said, I’m still growing up. So, some of my blog posts will just be “dump posts” in which I’m just writing for the sake of writing, but I still like it enough to share with the world.
So this is my first official “dump post”. This is a reminder to myself that I am capable of writing something because I’m never truly in short supply of words. I just need to remember to take the words that are swimming in my head and just type them out or hand write them out, depending on what suits my fancy in the moment.
As time progresses and I get better and more comfortable with my writing, I won’t consider any of my writing “dump posts”, but in the meantime it is what it is. I want to write because I love writing and I love finding ways to inspire people or just make them laugh. I’m working to become a master of my craft.
So, I’m having one of those lovely days where everything feels stupid. I feel like any and everything I’ve done with my writing is for nothing. I just want to stay in bed, put the covers over my head, and give up.
But life doesn’t work like that. Everything I’m doing will one day pay off. That’s what I have to remember. I can’t let a perfectly beautiful day escape me. I can’t ignore the opportunity to add more to a novel. I can’t let the chance to brainstorm a new idea go to waste. I have to keep going, especially on the days I just don’t want to. None of the words seem right, but it’s something written to be edited on another day.
So today sucks. But I’m alive. I’m drinking good coffee. I’m blessed with an opportunity to do some crappy writing. And I have a loving husband and spunky toddler waiting for me when I get home! All is well in the end. Regardless of what my feelings are trying to get me to believe.
Every person has a story worth being told. At least I think so. I often wish that I could tell every story in the world, but that is not a realistic possibility. However, it does not stop me from making up a couple of stories a day. One day I will write a story about a person’s life that will change the world. That is my ultimate dream.
I don’t remember what started my fascination with writing, but for as long as I have wanted to write about people. I would like to be a biographer, but in my own kind of way. I started with my mom’s parents and then my dad’s parents. And boy oh boy, they had some interesting stories. Those interviews took place over ten years ago and I’m glad I started with them because all of them have since passed. Both of my grandmothers kept diaries and I inherited those. I did multiple follow up interviews with all of them as well. My grandparents led very interesting lives and thankfully I got their written permission to share their stories with the world whenever I felt it was time for them to be shared.
After getting my grandparents’ stories, I moved onto my parents. It was awkward at first because I really wasn’t sure what to expect. But it wasn’t bad at all. If anything, it brought me a newfound appreciation for my parents. They still aren’t as cool as all of my grandparents, but I definitely respect them a hell of a lot more than I did before.
And that is where I stopped interviewing people. I have a long list of people who I feel are worth interviewing, but I keep coming back the my grandparents and their stories. It feels like something is there. I can’t exactly put my finger on it, but I do know that right in front of me is a very good story waiting to be told. No, scratch that, in front of me are multiple stories waiting to be told!
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